A little child has often been likened to a piece of clay that can be molded into whatever type of pottery that the potter (parent) has in mind. A little child is so pliable, so willing to be molded and so trusting. This can either be a fantastic opportunity or a tragic consequence depending on what the potter does. Solomon expresses this truth vividly when he says, "Train up a child in the way he should go, and when he is old, he will not depart from it" (Prov. 22:6). This is why Paul urged parents to "bring up your children in the nurture and admonition of the Lord" (Eph. 6:4).

When clay hardens, it is too late to mold it as you desire. So it is with children. In their young and tender years they can be taught and guided into the way of the Lord, but as they grow older, they become set and fixed in the mold that was cast. You can’t wait until a child is a teenager to mold him It begins before he is born. It takes place while he is a baby, while he is toddler and while he isa pre-schooler. Do you realize that most of a child’s molding has already taken place by the time he starts to school? Potters (parents), how are you molding your child? (1991)

Two young people were involved in an automobile accident which took the life of the boy and very seriously injured the girl. Both were high school students. Investigation showed that both had been drinking at the time of the wreck.

The girl’s father flew into a rage upon hearing of the drinking. "Just let me get my hands on the person who sold them the liquor and I will kill him," he exclaimed.

It was not until he got hom and went to get a drink that he found that his bottle was missing, and realized where they had gotten the liquor. Now, who was to blame?

A grade school boy was called before the principle with his parents for using profanity on the school ground. The mother was very indignant at "those bad kids from whom he picked up the bad words." It was not until later that day when the father was cursing the lawn mower that wouldn’t start that they realized where their little darling had learned the bad words. Who was to blame?

Instead of going to Bible school, little Johnny slipped off to earn some money caddying at the golf course. His mother was trying to explain to his Bible teacher that she just did not understand why Johnny was not in class that day. She was still explaining it when Johnny’s dad came in to put his golf clubs up from his regular Sunday match. Who was to blame?

The truth is that parents influence their children far more by their own actions than by all the words they can ever say. What is your influence on your children? (1971)

A popular song a few years ago had the line, "Teach your children well." Of course, this has always been the demand of God upon parents. Moses said to Israel, "And these words which I command you this day shall be upon your heart; and you shall teach them diligently to your children..." (Deut. 6:6-7b). Among the many parental proverbs of Solomon are words such as "Discipline your son, for in that there is hope; do not be a willing party to his death" (Prov. 19:18). Did you ever think about the solemn fact that your failure to "teach your children well" may be the cause of their death — maybe physically, but most assuredly spiritually? That’s heavy stuff, isn’t it? Then we are all familiar with "Train a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not turn from it" (22:6). This is re-echoed in Paul’s instructions to the Ephesians: "And, fathers, do not provoke your children to anger; but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord" (6:4). All these are saying, "teach your children well."

This cannot be accomplished in an hour or two a week or even an hour or two a day. This is an "all the time" assignment from God to parents. In infancy, in the very formative toddler stage, in childhood and throughout the teen years, this commitment is upon us to "teach our children well." It takes time — both "quality time" and "quantity time." It takes planning, patience, prayerfulness, and perseverance. It takes love, loyalty, labor, and leading. It take devotion, diligence, and discipline. Parents must cooperate in this great work.

It is not just telling a child all that he is doing wrong. That’s probably the most destructive way to rear a child. True, corrective discipline must be given. But along with that there must be love and affection. Luther was raised by a father who was over-strict to the point of cruelty which led Luther to say, "Spare the rod and spoil the child — that is true; but beside the rod keep an apple to give him when he has done well." Barclay gives us this account: "Benjamin West tells how he became a painter. One day his mother went out leaving him in charge of his little sister Sally. In his mother’s absence he discovered some bottles of coloured ink and began to paint Sally’s portrait. In the doing so he made a very considerable mess of things with ink blots all over. His mother came back. She saw the mess, but said nothing. She picked up the piece of paper and saw the drawing. ‘Why,’ she said, ‘it’s Sally!’ and she stooped and kissed him. Ever after Benjamin West used to say: ‘My mother’s kiss made me a painter.’ Encouragement did more than rebuke could ever do" (Ephesians, pp. 211-212).

Parents, are you "teaching your children well"? It’s time we really looked at our lives to see if we are keeping God’s charge to us. (1989)

A very serious problem exists among religious families: sometimes their children who have been brought up "in the church" are anxious to "get out of the house" so they won’t "have to go to church" anymore. This is a perplexing problem fraught with serious consequences. Why does a child want to "get away from" the church? What kind of children from what kind of families do so? I don’t know all the answers to questions like this, but let me suggest a few thoughts.

I believe that one real source of this attitude is that children are not taught to love the worship of the Lord. From the time they are infants the parents are yelling at them on Sundays to "hurry up and get up ‘cause we have to go to church" with the emphasis on "have." Nothing is said about the joy of worship. Nothing is said about the wonderful privilege that is ours. Children are taught that "going to church" is a drudge. No wonder they want to get away from it.

When children are in the assembly, often they are allowed to play with all sorts of toys and games. This causes them to think that the assembly is some place to play games; and then when they are older and too big to play games, they are bored with what is going on. Many children are not taught to sing. They are allowed to play when worship to God in song is being rendered. If they are not taught to sing as tiny tots, then as they grow older they will not sing. Parents, do you teach your children the words to songs at home so they will know them and be able to join in the singing? It is a sad sight to see teenagers just sitting and looking around instead of singing. No wonder they have no interest. They are not taught reverence during prayer. They keep on playing instead of being taught to always bow their heads in reverence. If you took your child to the funeral of a loved one, would you give him games to play? Would you allow him to "do his own thing" or would you teach him reverence and respect for the dead? No, our worship is not a funeral, but it is holy and children need to be taught that it is.

They must be taught to study the Word. Are you studying the class lessons with your children every day? Are you teaching them to enjoy that part of the day and really look forward to it? If this is the environment of a child, you will seldom see him wander away from the Lord. Those who are taught to study the Bible are the ones who listen to sermons and lessons. They are the ones who will understand much more of the lessons that are being presented. (And, by the way, what happened to the teenagers all sitting at the front? What an inspiration that is to the whole congregation!) These are the ones who grow up to love the Lord and stay with Him.

Friend, what are you teaching your children? To love God and His worship, His word, and His people? What you teach your child, who is a tiny tot now, will determine where he will be when he is old. Seems like Solomon said something like that somewhere. (1989)

When Paul had listed all the sins of the Gentiles and of the Jews and was summing up his argument as to why all need the gospel, he told us why there is so much sin in the world in these succint words: "There is no fear of God before their eyes" (Rom. 3:18). Jesus tells us that it is far more important to fear God, who can destroy both soul and body in hell, than to fear man who can only kill the body (Matt. 10:28). In order for our children to grow up into the righteous relationship with God, it is essential that we teach them to fear the Lord.

Shall we read just a few wise words from the sagacious Solomon? "The fear of the Lord is the beginning wisdom (Prov. 9:10) ... The fear of the Lord adds length to life, but the years of the wicked are cut short (10:27) ... He whose walk is upright fears the Lord, but he whose ways are devious despises Him (14:2). He who fears the Lord has a secure fortress, and for his children it will be a refuge. The fear of the Lord is a fountain of life, turning a man from the snares of death (14:26, 27) ... The fear of the Lord leads to life; then one rests content, untouched by trouble" (19:23).